This was all I could think about posting today! 🙂
There are some compliments I can never expect that leave me floating on Cloud Nine for the rest of the day. Most of the time they have nothing to do with my external appearance and everything to do with me as person from the inside.
Last week I received one from a man who had no idea how huge of a compliment it was when he said: “You know, women who have been raped or traumatized in that way might get triggered in a situation like that.” in a response to a story I was telling him.
My eyes opened wide at his statement, and he continued, “You don’t strike me as someone who has experienced that kind of trauma, you know, you can usually tell.”
I nodded in agreement, “Yes, it’s like you are branded when you been hurt that way. Other people can see it from you no matter how much you try to hide it.”
I was smiling at this point and I divulged to him how much his words had meant to me. He was shocked to hear that I had experienced trauma of that sort. “I can usually tell right away.”
“Yes, its usually pretty easy to tell. You know, that’s why it means so much to me that you said that. Because if you can’t tell with me then that means all the work I’ve been doing to heal and shift myself has been working and is bearing fruit.”
And that’s when I knew it was okay to take the break I’ve been on from delving deep into my shadows and into meditations. That’s when I knew I had made significant progress in my personal healing journey and it was time to celebrate. That is when I realized its time for me to drop those stories because they no longer apply.
When I began my journey with Kundalini Yoga one of the main drivers for me was to heal my aching and broken heart and my damaged sexuality. I wanted to eradicate all the trauma from my life and feel like a whole person again.
I wanted to shift from having a neon sign of “VICTIM” I felt I carried to being an ordinary person again.
And I wanted to attract into my life good, true, real and consciously evolving people.
After this conversation I knew that most of this has been accomplished. I have little things to work on but I don’t carry the trauma like I used to. I don’t carry hatred towards men any more and I don’t have that neon sign any more.
And I feel whole.
What an amazing practise. Gratitude for this practise and Yogi B is what I feel in my heart right now. <3
